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(OB-A04) Well-being
The art of being well.
Date posted: 15, April, 2003. By Divina Swan.
This article © 2003: OrangeBox, and must not be used without permission.

Over the last twenty or so years a silent epidemic has taken a grip of this country. An epidemic that nobody talks about or acknowledges, but which day-by-day claims yet more victims. One-in-four people will seek medical help for mental health related problems. I'm not talking of the small minority of individuals who hear voices or see little green men. No, I'm talking about millions of ordinary people, people just like you, who simply can't cope any longer with the pressures and the pace of modern life.

It is a curious fact that we do not notice small changes. Anyone who has kept a pet will be well aware of this. Only when Aunt Marge drops in on her annual, Christmas visit and says: "Wow! Hasn't it grown," do we realise that our cute little fur ball has changed into an enormous, ravenous beast. Our own lives reflect this blindness. An ordinary man, plucked from the 50s, 60s or even the 70s and dropped into our world, would experience enormous difficulty coping with both the dramatic increase in tempo, and our prevalent code of ethics. He would be quite correct in the assumption that we had all gone quite mad. My grandfather could build or fix anything with only a small bag of tools. My father could do the same, but required a garage full of equipment. Me? What spanner do I use to fix my DVD player? On the surface, the rise of technology offers us untold potential and freedom. However, the reality is that we have all become slaves to a bewildering array of gadgets we do not understand and feel no empathy with. Each day we sell our souls -cheaply- to spend time at a location we'd rather not be at, doing things we'd rather not be doing, with people we'd rather not be with. All this just so we can afford to do it all again next week… and the next. We make ourselves ill to be the first on our street to buy into the latest gimmick. A product we can't afford; have no use for; don't really want (or need) and which will fall apart or into disuse within a week. The things we own end up owning us. Each material possession is a brick in the wall we all spend our lives building. A wall that separates the people we are (and don't much like) from the people we could be.

We have all become small cogs in a vast machine. A machine that has one function; to blindly grind out more cogs to replace those that have outlived their usefulness. We all know in our hearts that the machine is close to meltdown but we choose not to look. We look away from the 2/3s of our world that do not have enough to eat. We do not see that 1/3 of our population has not reliable electricity or sanitation. We look away from these things because to acknowledge them would graphically illustrate the scale of our collective and individual failures and petty greed. Imagine for a moment that you were forced to spent the next twenty years marooned on a desert island with only the person you dislike the most for company. Pretty scary, eh. Next, imagine that after twenty years you were told that this person was to be removed and you were to spend the rest of your life alone. Even more scary!

As our egos grasp frantically at the coat-tails of progress, our souls yearn for the revolution that will return us to the mythical Golden Age. Back to a time when the world made sense. In some, this yearning manifests as an interest in yoga or line dancing. Others may seek fulfilment in the mysteries of Wicca, mysticism or even wine making. On the face of it, who in their right mind would spend three months fermenting a bucket of crushed fruit into a liquid of uncertain character. Why not simply buy a perfectly good bottle for a couple of pounds at the local off-licence? Wine making is not about wine! It is about regaining control. It is a small, womb-like bubble of comfort and security, which we can immerse ourselves in and feel an integral part of. It is a priceless sense of worth and value in an impersonal, cynical and increasingly nonsensical world.

Imagine that tonight, a super-powered deity appeared in your living room and said:

"Tell me the path you wish your life would take and I shall make it so. You have two minutes."

Could you? Or, would you splutter out some vague waffle along the lines of 'Lottery win' or 'Rock star' or 'Pub owner.' An old Chinese proverb suggests that A Man without a target hit nothing. Put simply, most people are not living the life of their dreams because they have absolutely no idea what this may be. Nor have they considered any of the necessary steps that would take them towards their perfect life. In fact, the chances are that the path of your life resembles that of an empty bag wafting aimlessly in the breeze. Without realising it, you have spent your entire life on automatic pilot

In a country garden, it is not usual to hear the flowers discussing amongst themselves the best or right time to flower. Roses do not fret that they may be the wrong colour, shape or size. A cat does not worry that it may be acting in a manner not appropriate for a cat. The Sun does not fear to burn… So, why should you? 'Regret' is perhaps the most futile of human emotions. Forty years from now the world at large will not care what car you drove, or where your curtains were made. However, forty years from now it may matter a great deal to you that you never got round to doing… It is never too late! One determined man (ie: Jesus, Hitler, etc.) can change the world. Are you able to change just one life: Your own!

The secret of true happiness is simple and obtainable. It can be located inside your own heart. To obtain the life of one's dreams it is necessary only to identify the things that give pleasure, and to do these things. Lasting fulfilment and contentment are not to be located within the hazy pipe dreams of a better future, tomorrow. But are found in the single, fleeting moment called 'now.' A moment that is not lost forever, but which radiates out and fills our hearts with joy. Well-being is the childlike and complete absorption in what we are doing; where we are doing it; and the people we are doing it with. Find this moment, then lose yourself in it. Your life is not a rehearsal: Don't dream it, be it!

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